Gay bully
I still have nightmares about this person: nightmares where I am thirteen again, standing in the hallways of my tiny educational facility out in the middle of nowhere. My mission in these nightmares is to avoid being seen, to hide behind locker doors until I create it to the shelter of the bathroom. But I am always seen, and when I am, it feels like the monster caught me. I wake up sweating. I put my hand to my heart.
I think it was the casual way he joined in on the harassment that made me hate him. The way after someone called me “faggot” he would parrot them, ally himself with them, use me to form solidarity with others.
I came to notice him as the embodiment of what had happened to me. He was everyone who didn’t halt it. He was everyone who could have helped me.
And so, I carried his voice with me for years. He doesn’t know it, but he’s had a major impact on my life. As I got older, I became impossible to discuss with or criticize. Whenever someone tried to confront me, even in a respectful way, I would see his face again. I would hear his voice. I would sense ganged up on. I would become defensive. I would lash out.
“Dude,” the other person might speak. “Relax.”
But it only made me angrier.
Gay teen catches bully on video outside his house in viral TikTok video
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LGBTQ+ Bullying
School can be challenging for any pupil, but many LGBTQ+ young people face an alarming amount of bullying and harassment. Homophobic and biphobic bullying is where people are discriminated against and treated unfairly by other people because they are lesbian, gay, bi-curious, trans or questioning or perceived to be. People who are not queer woman , gay, bisexual, gender non-conforming or questioning can also experience homophobic and biphobic bullying if someone thinks that they are.
Transphobic bullying is where people are discriminated against and treated unfairly by other people because their gender identity doesn’t align with the sex they were assigned at birth or perhaps because they do not conform to stereotyped gender roles or ‘norms’.
(The above definition was taken from the LGBT Foundation )
Like all forms of bullying, homophobic bullying can be through designate calling, spreading rumours, online bullying, physical, sexual or sentimental abuse and can include:
- Making comments about a person’s gender or sexuality that deliberately makes them feel uncomfortable
- Calling a person names or teasing them
- Hitting, kicking, punching or physically hurting them
- Inappr
In1978,when I was barely 13, I participated in the sport of gay bullying. Which makes me the classic closeted thug who later turned gay. The teen I bullied was a awesome friend. He was an designer, and an extremely talented one. It was his artistic proficiency that made me so covetous, not his manhood. But I hid that, and instead I called him a fag.
I remember him saying to me, "Matt, you know this isn't true." And me gritting my teeth and growling bitterly under my breath just loud enough for everyone to hear, "You're a fag." We never made up. So I am writing this essay to publicly admit fault to a man who later went on to become a father of five boys, and who never exhibited a lesbian tendency in the entire period I knew him.
And here's the rub, when my have sister was dying of a rare illness, it was this man, a hospice nurse, who nurtured her at a critical time in her struggle. And that was how I treated him when we were adolescent. How's that for a smack in the face? One good deserved slap right upside the head, I'd say. I am George Minafer in Booth Tarkington's "The Magnificent Ambersons", receiving my comeuppance.
It didn't stop with him. I belittled other queer kids in high s